The narcissist stresses us chronically, deeply.   I post this study not to scare people, but to warn them.  Information such as this can be empowering. We are not here to give up our lives to abuse.  We do not feed ourselves poison, yet that is what we do when we let the narcissist harm us.

Heart-Felt Stress Can Be Dangerous To Immune System

Source: Center For The Advancement Of Health

People who react to stress more in the heart than in the vascular system are more likely to suffer immune system problems, according
to a new study.

Public speaking and similar stress-inducing situations stimulate a physical reaction in two ways: The heart pumps harder and the blood
vessels stiffen, leading to a rise in blood pressure. In some people the rise is mainly due to the increase in heart output, while in others it’s due to the increased resistance to blood flow in the vessels.

[click to continue…]

Share

{ 0 comments }

Verbal and Emotional Abuse

by Ann Bradley on October 7, 2011

Recognizing abuse can give you skills to successfully interact with a narcissist.  Verbal abuse is emotional abuse.

Verbal Abuse
by Kerby Anderson

Introduction

Most everyone has heard of or knows someone who has been verbally abused. Perhaps you are involved in a verbally abusive relationship.  It is possible that no one knows your circumstances. Verbal abuse is a kind of battering which doesn’t leave evidence comparable to the bruises of physical battering. You may be suffering in silence and isolation.

In this article, I want to tackle this very important issue in an effort to understand this phenomenon and provide answers.  Like any area of human action, it begins in the mind and heart. Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.” What a person thinks in his mind and heart will be reflected in his words and actions.

[click to continue…]

Share

{ 1 comment }

Evil

by Ann Bradley on October 7, 2011

EVIL

M.Scott Peck and Sam Vaknin disagree on whether narcissists are evil.

Is it evil to belittle, denigrate, scapegoat, and make fun of someone until they are demoralized, subjugated, and  traumatized?  Is the verbal and emotional abuser who keeps his victim in suspense and fear an evil  person?  Is the person with the need to control others evil?

According to M. Scott Peck, M.D,  psychiatrist and author of The People of The Lie, the answer is yes.

According to Peck, most of us view a situation in light of how we are affected by it and only as an afterthought do we stop to consider how it might affect others involved;  we do eventually consider the viewpoint of the other.
[click to continue…]

Share

{ 2 comments }

Characteristics of the Narcissist

by Ann Bradley on October 7, 2011

The Narcissist

Certain characteristics appear with stunning regularity among narcissists.

Since narcissism is on a continuum, some will have more than others.
[click to continue…]

Share

{ 5 comments }

 LOVE, BETRAYAL, and  DIVORCE – A Little Guide to BIG Things 

Only $12.95! Immediate Download in pdf

When pain is felt in every cell find a way to make that pain work for you

There is recovery from betrayal, recovery from narcissistic abuse and return to joy.

[click to continue…]

Share

{ 3 comments }

The Bottom Line With A Narcissist

by Ann Bradley on September 20, 2011

Are you afraid of your partner?  Does he or she force you to agree with them? Still feeling the sting from a parent’s words? Always being manipulated?

Because living with a narcissist can be extremely painful, it is important to understand:

  • You are not to blame
  • Narcissists ensnare everyone
  • Learning how to leave is important
  • Rebuilding a life takes courage but you can do it
  • There are plenty of people to help you, but it may not be your family or friends
  • Information can be your ally to learn you are not alone
  • It will take time to heal

SELF TALK and the Narcissist – HELP YOURSELF  Back to Normal

[click to continue…]

Share

{ 0 comments }

DIVORCING A NARCISSIST? THE JOY OF EX can be yours

by Ann Bradley on August 29, 2011

The narcissist makes a divorce a battleground and you are the enemy.

Male or female, partner, spouse or parent, being the victim of a dysfunctional person is one of life’s most difficult tasks.   You are not to blame and there is help. You are not alone. Narcissism is a personality disorder but there is also acquired situational narcissism.  A victim can be from an upscale life or not. Abuse strikes everyone.

[click to continue…]

Share

{ 4 comments }

What Is Narcissism?

by Ann Bradley on August 11, 2011

Ann Bradley, M.A. is a consultant, coach, speaker, and the author of Let’s Talk About Narcissism and DIVORCE: The Real Truth and Hidden Dangers. Ann’s books are available on Amazon Kindle, the iBookstore, and the Nook. She attended the University of Pennsylvania, Antioch College and Stanford University (Ph.D graduate studies).  Ann is a certified positive psychology coach who studied with Martin Seligman, PhD. from the University of Pennsylvania. She has extensive experience working with high conflict divorces and the men and women involved in them.

Narcissistic Abuse

When the infrastructure of a building is gone the collapse is inevitable.

We use that analogy to draw us in to the collapse of a life; a collapse orchestrated by a narcissistic wife or husband with assistance from the legal system. From that collapse, arises terror, fear, pain and loss of voice. But listen carefully, for brave voices thunder through the universe with truth and power and refusal to accept the silencing. These voices embraces pain and demand justice. This is a hero’s journey: a heart motivated fury, outrage tempered with wisdom and these voices are a gift to all of us.

What is narcissism?

…it is verbal abuse, physical abuse,  put downs, manipulation, betrayal, lack of empathy, accusations, failure to communicate, lack of intimacy…it is all of this and more. Relationships are never easy but an abusive one is damaging in so many ways.

Narcissism is categorized as a personality disorder by the mental health profession.  It is referred to as NPD or Narcissistic Personality Disorder.  Few are ever diagnosed because few go to therapy.   Narcissism is not high self-esteem, but a condition where the typical narcissist suffers from

  • Preoccupation with hiding real or perceived flaws
  • Overestimation of  importance, achievements, talents and skills
  • Maladaptive attention seeking behavior
  • Inability to empathize with others
  • Excessive anger and shame in response to criticism often resulting in rage

The narcissist will often manipulate others, especially partners,  to control them.  Projection and blame are hallmarks of this manipulation.  It is estimated that 85% of narcissists are males. This site respects all victims of emotional abuse, both male and female.

KNOWING YOU ARE NOT ALONE IS IMPORTANT

Many people think they are the only ones victimized but you are not and you are in very good company. You don’t have to suffer when you leave, and you can learn from what others know.  Men – don’t be alarmed that it refers to narcissistic men – we know it is just as applicable to women.

CLICK HERE to learn about breaking up with a narcissist so you don’t have to be alone in your struggle.

Share

{ 0 comments }